Naturally, you were disappointed when you found out he had a girlfriend and, yes, you were a little jealous of her.
Okay, a lot jealous.
Like, a lot lot.
But that was five years ago and, while you still find him undeniably attractive, you had no choice but to move on from your unrequited crush when you realized that absolutely nothing would come of it.
Adam is the committed, relationship type; a thing you both admire and lament because you’re not the one he’s committed to.
Well…used to lament.
Those days are long behind you, thank God.
You continue to eye him for a moment. He looks…stressed; a lot more than usual. And quiet.
“You okay?” you ask against your better judgment.
He turns to you, seeming surprised, his brows arching briefly.
“Y-yeah,” he smiles, somewhat awkwardly, but the warmth in his dark brown eyes makes it endearing, somehow. “Just got a lot on my mind.”
But he doesn’t go any further.
You’re tempted to ask him if he wants to talk about it, but you decide against that. You can tell something’s wrong, that he’s holding back, but you don’t push. Prying is not on your to-do list today.
Plus, keeping your emotional distance from Adam is what helped you get over your feelings for him in the first place. And, after how much time and effort that took, you’d like for it to stay that way.
So, you decide to do what you came to do, instead; mind your own damn business.
Your focus shifts to jump-starting a week-long rally against offshore drilling on the Pacific coast. It’ll be one of many you’ve participated in but the first you’ve ever organized—and your very first volunteer project for the new year.
You scan the cramped space, feeling a small wave of both sadness and nostalgia as you stare at the repurposed furniture backed up against chipping, pastel walls.
Coming to terms with the fact that this is going to be your last semester in this old little office is bitter-sweet. You really love it here. Even though it’s still a tad run-down and could certainly use an upgrade, its unique setup imparts a certain character you’ve become quite fond of, and a part of you wouldn’t change any of it for anything.
Okay…maybe the windows could use some blinders and the ceiling could stand to be slightly higher.
Still, your sentiment holds. This office and the people who’ve been in it have been a major part of your life for so many years.
But, while you’ll miss it, you know that growth in life involves change; which is what you want your final months as an undergrad to be all about.
Your sole New Year’s resolution.
You glance at your watch, your shoe dangling from your foot impatiently. Just under two hours have passed by the time you’re done with the initial outline and all the preliminary paperwork. You still have a ways to go and countless details to sort out but you decide to leave those for another day, feeling too out-of-it to keep going. At the same time, this weird restlessness you can’t seem to shake off won’t let you call it a day just yet.
Switching gears, you pull out your laptop, opening up a customized editor, your fingers settling on your keyboard as you stare at the blank screen.
A small rush of excitement hits you even though you’ve done this so many times before, like riding your favorite bike on a new route.
It’s still hard to believe that something you started only two years ago has exploded into this; one of the top-ranked environmental blogs on the web. And to think its creation was for nothing more than documenting a few thoughts, firsthand experiences and personal musings on the environment.
You honestly never thought anyone else would read it, let alone care about your opinions or what you had to say.
Again, a byproduct of controlling, repressive parents.
But someone did read it. And another, and another, and before you knew it, you had readers visiting your blog every single day, sending you messages and asking when the next post would come. Leaving comments about how much more they now know because of your publications. How much they enjoy your delivery as much as your message. How you’ve inspired them to be more health-conscious. More aware of their role and impact on the planet. What they put both in and on their bodies and how it affects them both short and long term. The way the revolution of the food industry has shaped the current health crisis in the West and how it’s extending to the rest of the world. Etcetera. Etcetera.
On a whim, you start typing, deciding on a slightly more…eccentric post; one that speaks to your—admittedly underdeveloped—poetic side. One a lot less conventional and scholastic than you’ve penned so far.
Then again, you did say you want change. And what better place to start?
You title it:
If the Earth were a guy…